In this Bonus Episode, I read for you what I consider to be one of the most important documents in recent US political history. I plan to address this document in my usual style in the near future, complete with as many jokes as I can muster.

Remember when I accused NPR podcasters of parading themselves inappropriately in front of would-be ad buyers like cheap prostitutes? I'm still not over that, it seems. I have that idea, and I'm sticking to it.